So, looks like we are in a new routine and it is MUCH better than our old one thank goodness. Yes, we still have tantrums but they are caused by triggers and I see them coming a mile away. By drawing Sweet M* in and sitting next to him or holding him (like a baby) it seems like I am able to go through the emotions with him and bring him back to calm.
The neatest part is there are real signs of growth. Sweet M* now gives me spontaneous hugs for no reason. He has (on several occasions) been able to get in trouble like the other kids without getting stuck in a negative mode... you know for little things. Just a warning used to send him into crazy land.
And, a few days ago he went to his very first dentist appointment and he had to go with the dentist by himself. I sat in the waiting room. He did amazing!!! He had no cavities and he did everything they asked. I was most proud of him when he walked out and said, "Mom, guess what I knew that you would be here for me when I was done." No one else in that room knew why I had tears in my eyes... but that was the FIRST time I think he has ever trusted me to be there for him. The picture above was from that appointment :)
These are good days!
2 comments:
got tears in my eyes reading this! AS I mentioned before, Will still is comforted in knowing where I am when I am home with him. Heartbreaking, but he was abandoned so those issues surrounding it will be with him his whole life. Glad things are BETTER!
Susan
Tears in my eyes, too. You have made such an amazing difference for him and for your whole family by doing THE HARDEST THING - focusing on what you could change about you and how you interacted. This focus on changing us so that we can heal our kids and help our families has amazing power (and is so much harder than just addressing THEIR behaviors, isn't it)?! I hope you all have a great weekend. :-)
Megan
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