I can hardly believe it too but it is true. So, far the theory is good. I even completely stopped a tantrum coming on today (and it was big) with some extra love and sillyness. Man did it feel good. Some new rules hubby and I have given ourselves:
1) Get a Break... Parenting kids from hard places is no easy task and we deserve it. Guilt free!
2)Clean Slate... we are acting and even talking as if Sweet M* just joined the family. Day 3 and he is doing so well.
3) Only allow LOVE to shine through our eyes... view all behaviors as intense sadness and fear. It is what they really are about anyways.
4) Before school and after work/ before bed belongs 100% to the kids. Eyes on them, down playing with them the whole time.
5) Forget about the manipulative behaviors etc... If I have to "fake it til I make it" I need to grant him the same grace.
6) Constant reassurance, whispers of how M* was exactly the piece to our family that we were missing, we wouldn't be complete without him, we love him, we are never leaving him, he is safe etc... CONSTANT!!!
7) Remembering his emotional age.
8) Lower all expectations and expect regression
9) Do not shame him in anyway only build his self worth.
Alrighty... now some catch up photos of my handsome man...