No Fear!

Tuesday's event really shook me up. I had a hard time sleeping and Wednesday morning I felt so stressed. But, I talked to a good friend who reminded me that Tuesday was caused by a trigger. I could have prevented it and will next time. And, that if Sweet M* really wanted to hurt the others he would have. It is getting rid of the fear that helps me. Realizing that I am in control of the situation. I just have to remember that even though my sweet boy looks so normal he can get scared and go into survival mode at any time if there is a trigger.

This occasion was caused by hubby and I being gone at bed time and bc we had not properly trained the sitter on what to do "if" he were to go into that state. My plan is I am going to teach her that Sweet M*'s scared and nervous looks like extreme hyper and silliness followed by complete disobedience. I will let her know that he will only get worse unless she brings him in confronts the emotion by verbalizing it for him and then sits with him until he comes back to his normal state (most likely after some crying). She will be prepared next time... as will any other sitter in the future.

It is so sad that M* still gets that scared of us leaving and not coming back. His fear of abandonment is so raw and real. I hope and pray that someday he will realize how much we love him.

To get back to Wed. though he had a great day. He must have tried so hard at school because he came home with two good day tickets. That means he was not talked to even once and he went above and beyond. I think he was trying to make up for the night before ;) He was a little sad all day. He knew he upset us and I think he was trying the woes me card. But, he had good behavior all night and went to bed just fine. Today is Thursday and so far so good :)