Monday, March 28, 2011

Two Nights Away

This past weekend me and the hubby spent our first two nights away from the kids since leaving for Ethiopia last April. WOOHOO!!!!!We met up with my hubby's college friends and had a BLAST!!!

I was very concerned about Sweet M* though bc I knew how hard it is on him to have a change in his routine. I made detailed notes for his sitters (all family) about our daily routine and complications and solutions they might run into. I pretty much looked like a crazy uptight mom who loves control. However, I knew the more they could keep things close to normal the better Sweet M* would do.

I received excellent reports on night one and two but unfortunately day 3 must have been his breaking point. There were two incidences that were completely out of character for M. It crushes my heart to hear about what Sweet M* did and as mad as you want to be with him you know that it is fear that drives him to resort to these survival/ orphanage type behaviors. The poor baby has been through so much.

So, today we are back to loss of privileges and chores. I am giving lots of high praise for good work and steady love and eye contact. I am talking to him about right and wrong and I can tell he feels bad for what occurred.

The good news is that I prepared myself before I left knowing that we would most likely see a backlash for leaving. And, I think that helped me handle the situation. He did make it through the two nights and hubby and I got our much needed and deserved break.

We are so fortunate to have such wonderful family that are close by to help us.


MRK said...

You are doing so great to have such perspective on this (it is so much easier to THINK you'll have that attitude and that perspective when you are just reading all of the attachment books before you are actually dealing with the behaviors day in and day out). I'm so happy for you that you got a much-needed break, even though you have a bit of a price to pay as you try to get back to the routine. Sure wish we had some family nearby!


Shaista said...

Its difficult to read with the template that you have..