Sunday, October 10, 2010

Pumpkin Patch Fun!











We had a lot of fun this weekend at the pumpkin patch. Firsts with M* are always a true joy. To watch a kiddo at his age experience all of the magic each season brings is a gift. And, I am so excited about all the holidays that are soon on their way.

This past Thursday we hit the 5 month home from Ethiopia mark, and it made me think about how far Sweet M* has come in the past 5 months. Day to day is pretty routine now and I think we know M*'s moods and triggers and we are able to work pretty well around them. Of course he is 3 1/2 so some tantrums are just age related... but at least now we are able to tell the difference.

I can also tell that M* is getting more comfortable with us now as he has started to initiate affection and enjoy snuggling much more than he had in the past. It is "real" now. Just like his smile. If you take a look at the picture above with him on the horse you will see his true "real" smile. In the beginning he didn't know how to smile at all, then he transitioned to a clenched teeth smile ( I think he was just imitating us) and more recently we have been seeing the gorgeous smile that melts my heart.

One thing I never thought about while I was waiting to bring M* home was how often I would think about his birth family and all the tragedy that surrounds adoption. As the adoptive parent we are excited to get through the process and bring "our" child home. We want them so badly that I think it blinds us (at least it did me) and we often too easily forget all the unfortunate circumstances that leaves our children needing new families. I honestly do not think that a day passes by where I do not think of Sweet M*'s special people in Ethiopia... that I don't wish I could email them photos, videos etc... of him and his laughter and joy. I wonder how they are and if they are healthy. And, lately M* has been missing someone or something a lot. It is hard to watch him go through the grieving and sadness that is part of his story. I cannot pretend it didn't happen or bandage the wound... all I can do is assure him that we love him and will care for him always.

All this grieving has really affected me and I feel like I have so much more to do for Ethiopia. I have big plans, but they can't happen until after my kiddos are off to college so... one thing I want to do that is plausible for me to do right now is sponsor a child. There is an organization that is based in M*'s area of birth and I am pretty sure that is where I am going to start. It is called Common River and you can check it out here. But, there is also this great organization and you have such an intimate contact with your sponsor child that I am not sure which I will choose. Do you sponsor a child? Do you recommend a certain organization?? Leave me a comment if you do :)

4 comments:

Mary said...

Such gorgeous photos of your family all together. Thanks for sharing those, and thanks for your honesty throughout the process. You just said everything I've been feeling lately, but can hardly put into words.

MRK said...

Amber,

what a joy to see real smiles from all of your children!

I will try to get my husband to finish writing about our experience at Common River tonight so that I can get it on the blog in a day or so. It was an amazing place where we felt so connected to the special place where our kids are from.

Megan

Calmil2 said...

What???? WHere is the picture of ALL 4 kids in the wheelbarrow together (and and least 1 crying)? Looks like fun!! We are going this weekend :)

DooWad said...

hi. really like the pictures, about the happiness of the people if they were watching. thank you